I’m deep into the process of arranging poems into new collections. Wondering about their order, their title, their theme.
This is the season of quiet creative spaciousness behind the scenes. I love this part, even when it challenges me in the best way.
Here’s a poem I wrote a year or two ago entitled, “home.” It bubbled up in a season of shocking new way of understanding myself. Everything I knew about me dissolved into a puddle on the floor and I tried to figure out what to do next. It was a beautiful and terrifying place to live.
Maybe you find yourself in those places once in a while too. You’re not alone.
home
i don’t like this space
in between what i knew
and what i will know
i’m lost in this chaos
i want to feel
like me again
but she’s gone
— maybe that’s okay
I’m not sure I’m okay with not being the same as I was. But I don’t have a choice. I liked myself and I’m hoping that I will like the person I’m becoming.
I’m also into a period of reorganizing the things I’ve written; tracking down the 12 or 27 or 39 versions of each story; trying to make things findable. I wonder if the chaos I’ve created is my sneaky way of procrastinating in order to avoid sharing what I’ve written with the world. 😧